Ali used to want sex more than James, and feels guilty that she doesn’t enjoy it as much as she used to
How do you do it? Share the story of your sex life, anonymously
Any pressure to have sex doesn’t come from James – it comes from within, from a fear of complete loss
I used to really enjoy sex, but since menopause my drive has completely disappeared. I just don’t feel like a sexual being any more. The problem isn’t that I’m too dry – it’s more mental. I don’t even enjoy kissing, touching or oral as much as I used to. Although I feel a huge amount of grief over the loss of my sexuality, I honestly couldn’t care less if I never have sex again.
Any pressure to have sex doesn’t come from James – it comes from within, from a fear of complete loss. I still have some hope, but I’ve always been a glass-half-empty kind of person, shy and self-conscious. When I met James at work eight-and-a-half years ago, I actually wanted sex more than he did, and because I lacked confidence I immediately assumed he didn’t find me attractive, or that something was wrong with me.
