Growing up gay in the 90s, Verity and Darya lacked the confidence to talk about their desires. Verity’s attraction to a colleague changed all that
How do you do it? Share the story of your sex life, anonymously
I never felt that stomach-churning excitement and uncertainty we associate with desire
A couple of years ago, Darya and I had a crisis in our relationship. I developed an infatuation with a colleague, a woman who made me feel nervous and insecure, in a way I never had with Darya. I started to question whether I’d ever been attracted to Darya, because she had only ever made me feel loved and comfortable – I never felt that stomach-churning excitement and uncertainty we associate with desire.
Darya and I got together 20 years ago, but were friends first. Sex was fun and pleasurable, but it was our conversations and emotional connection that really made me fall in love with her. As the years went by, sex became something I did to keep things ticking along. Part of the problem was that we both lacked sexual confidence.
