There are a myriad of reasons why my libido went for a long walk and never returned. Two kids in my forties, IVF (the least sexy thing), perimenopause, then menopause, weight gain, work stress, the domestic load, having too many cats with too many ailments – a veritable smorgasbord of reasons not to feel “up for it”.
I started taking HRT in my late forties after struggling with some particularly gnarly perimenopause symptoms (insomnia, anxiety, and heart palpitations). It helped a little, but I found that when I hit 50, I was anxious and overthinking. I’d also forgotten what it felt like to have a libido. I would watch romantic Netflix shows and marvel at characters who had rampant sex.
I spoke to friends of a similar age, and they felt their libidos had disappeared, too. I only know of two couples who have a “healthy sex life”. (A quick Google search reveals “once a month” is about right for people in their fifties apparently, but it’s obviously more about what feels right for you.) Anyway, I thought it was a good idea to look into my HRT again and went to see a hormone doctor privately for a consultation.
As part of this consultation and after a blood test, I was prescribed testosterone – along with a different mix of HRT, though this prescription was issued on the NHS so didn’t prove to be super expensive – I pay for the annual HRT subscription which works out £19 annually. Women can get testosterone on the NHS, but it requires specialist initiation, usually via a menopause clinic. I am paying £60 for mine and I think it’ll last at least three to four months.
