I thought focusing on grades would push my son harder. It crushed his confidence instead.

The author said she stoped focusing on her kids' grades first when reviewing the report cards.

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Life taught me a painful truth. The mistakes we make as new parents are often our biggest opportunities to learn and improve, but our children, especially the firstborns, bear the brunt of that learning curve. At least that's how it is in my family, and I suspect in many others as well.During the first few years of my oldest son's schooling, I used to make report card day a big deal. It took a painful realization to make me adopt a much healthier, highly successful approach instead, one that completely changed our family dynamics for the better.Earlier, my focus when opening a report card was entirely academicEven though I always believed I was a parent who prioritized character, manners, and behavior, my inexperience blinded me to fixate solely on grades, especially the lower ones, a habit that was hampering my son's confidence.When the grades arrived, I used to pinpoint the few flaws that were noted before celebrating any successes. I would obsess over why he received below-average marks in a few areas. I was focusing on the subjects where he lost points, overlooking the ones where he excelled.