SINGAPORE: Whatever you think about patting someone else’s child on the head, I think we can all agree that a violent reaction is not acceptable. Police investigations are ongoing into an Aug 15 incident in which a father allegedly shoved a 73-year-old man to the ground after the latter patted his young daughter on the head. But the Roxy Square incident has since evolved beyond whether that initial gesture crossed a line. How people judged the incident quickly revealed their diagnoses of what ails society today.It’s generational: Older generations have always done this to show affection. Young parents are too sensitive about it.It’s cultural: Young parents have filled their heads with Western ideas of parenting and personal space. Singapore’s Asian values are more communitarian.
It’s social: We’ve retreated from each other, while being constantly exposed to stories of danger in other parts of the world. Not every stranger is a potential pervert or kidnapper. None of these explanations feels complete to me.THE ENVIRONMENT HAS CHANGED, NOT JUST PARENTSPersonal boundaries are not a new concept, but they have become more explicit. The way we teach them to children has become more deliberate.In school, Primary 1 students learn about a “good touch” versus a “bad touch” and to seek out a trusted adult if they feel unsafe. Age-appropriate knowledge and skills, such as recognising sexual abuse and harassment, are taught as they grow. Even pre-schoolers are taught about respecting body boundaries – both theirs and others. Children today are taught to have awareness and a vocabulary to express it.
