As told to
Harriet Edleson
Rose Marie Obey.
Courtesy of Rose Marie Obey
This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Rose Marie Obey, an 80-year-old widow living in a retirement community in Ambler, Pennsylvania. The following has been edited for length and clarity.After my husband of 54 years, Lee, died last year, I knew I didn't want to stay in our big house. I visited a friend at a retirement community and didn't like it, but I found another community, Gwynedd Estates in Ambler, Pennsylvania, that appealed to me more.It's pretty. It's white. I like how they keep the lawn. I have a parking space. It's quiet. When I walk in the door, it feels like I'm coming home. Yet when I first saw it, I kept looking for things I didn't like because I didn't want the stress of moving.I asked myself, "Why shouldn't you do it?" What's going to be so negative?" I prayed to avoid the stress of moving, but now that I've sold my house and made the move, I feel good about it.I didn't know if I would move because I had so many people around meI had lived in my house for 44 years, and I had family and friends to support me. One of my reservations was that some of my best friends live on either side of my house. I didn't want someone to move into my house who might play loud music. I prayed really hard about this.However, I didn't believe in having people come help me with the house all the time, and there were finances to consider.I worked for Merck, a pharmaceutical company, for 27 years in regulatory affairsI had been a union worker, but my manager told me that if I became salaried, there would be advantages, so I switched and took advantage of the retirement plan match. I stuck with that. If there's a match, why wouldn't anybody take advantage of it?
