"Have yourself a good life."
That was my friend's message informing me of his plan to end his life through physician-assisted suicide. His pancreatic cancer had progressed and was no longer responding to treatments. Weeks before, he shared he might soon enter hospice. He reflected upon his proudest lifetime accomplishment as my surgery scheduler: creating a new policy for clinic patients to expedite care.
The tumor soon caused a bowel obstruction requiring hospitalization. His surgeon said nothing more could be done. He planned to end his life before he could no longer be independent.
When I saw him in the hospital, he was upset to learn the costs for the morphine cocktail and physician to deliver the medications reached nearly $2,200. The social workers told him MediCal would only cover a hospice nurse, and he did not have the income to cover these extra expenses. He did not want his family or friends to be financially burdened.
Unfortunately, within days after discharge, he was readmitted with another obstruction. From his hospital bed, he resolved to end his life after returning home. Three of us were present at the end -- he was grateful not to be alone as it takes great courage to drink the cocktail. What do you say to someone in the last 30 minutes of life? We talk about firsts in life (first job, first love) but not lasts. The conversation was as carefree as any other. I thanked him for his friendship and excellent patient care, and wished him well on his journey.
