After high school, a friend I was very close to drifted away. Should I seek closure from her? | Leading questions

Getting closure and reaching out are two different questions, writes advice columnist Eleanor Gordon-Smith. One may not help with the other

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Should I try to seek closure with a person I used to love but drifted apart from, or is it best to leave them be?

There’s a person I used to be really close to who doesn’t talk to me any more. We didn’t have a fight. We just drifted, but I still think about them all the time.

We were really close from year 7 to year 12. The truth is I had a devastating crush on her. I told her about it one day; she let me down very sweetly and our friendship continued. She was the first (and so far only) person I’ve ever felt I loved. She’s the reason I identify as bi. And I believed for a few years she loved me too, if in a different way to how I hoped.