A Microsoft researcher built a working neural network out of goats, bridges, and ice ramps in the Age of Empires II map editor. What looks like a joke is a pointed critique of AI research methods. His analysis of 315 papers found that more than half already assume language models have human-like traits before the experiment even starts. Replace the chat interface with wandering goats, and the math doesn't change, but the feeling that you're talking to someone does.