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July 30 is recognized globally as International Day of Friendship, a holiday meant to observe different cultures, promote peace and strengthen human solidarity.Now I’ll admit to not being the bestest of friends — I’m constantly called out for not calling anyone first and am prone to going ghost for a few weeks at a time. But when I do answer the phone, respond to a text or make a rare appearance at a major meetup, I take the time to catch up with my closest buddies as much as possible and make an effort to create long-lasting memories that get referenced during future hangouts.One conversation that comes up a lot when I talk to them is how hard it is to make new friends as an adult. Unless it’s someone they’ve met at work, some of them (including me) have a hard time being in the sorts of situations that help widen their social circle.With that dilemma in mind, I asked ChatGPT for counsel on the best methods to employ if I want to make new friends. Luckily, this digital advice session gave me a practical list of tips and a workable plan that will keep me busy for the next three months.Taking notes on how to meet new people in my late 30s
(Image credit: Shutterstock)To kick this latest chatbot advice session off, I presented this prompt to ChatGPT: “Give me the seven best tips on how to make friends as an adult. For reference, I'm 38 years old and reside in New York City.”I also made mention of the hobbies and activities that matter the most to me, such as gaming, bowling, playing pool, attending live wrestling events, stuffing my face with Korean BBQ & Jamaican cuisine and indulging in otaku culture (anime lies at the heart of that last interest of mine).Before ChatGPT laid out its suggestions, it gave me an explanation of what it truly takes to meet new people, build those blossoming relationships and why living in a big city gives me an advantage when it comes to making new friends:Get instant access to breaking news, the hottest reviews, great deals and helpful tips.Making friends as an adult is less about charisma and more about repeated exposure, shared experiences, and taking initiative. That's actually good news, because those are things you can control. Since you're 38 and living in New York City, you have one huge advantage: there are almost endless opportunities to meet people who already share your interests. The challenge isn't finding people—it's turning acquaintances into actual friends.One of the tips that spoke to me and my good intentions the most was to start looking for my next regular activity instead of actively looking for friends. ChatGPT pointed out that most adult friendships take shape because people repeatedly run into each other in group settings. Instead of constantly asking myself, “Where can I meet new people and make new friends?”, I should be asking myself, “Where can I see the same people every week?”Based on my favorite pastimes, ChatGPT stated that the best group activities that can introduce me to new people who could become familiar faces worth befriending are weekly board game/video game nights, a bowling or pool league, local wrestling watch parties, fighting game tournaments, anime watch parties and food-based social groups.Two of the other pieces of practical advice from ChatGPT that caught my attention included:Say "yes" more often than feels comfortable: Introverts (and busy adults) naturally decline invitations because staying home feels easier. A useful rule to remember is “If you're at least 60% interested, go.” You don't have to stay all night. Even showing up for an hour can strengthen relationships. Momentum matters more than duration.Focus on creating "micro-friendships": You don't need a new best friend. You need someone new to grab lunch with, someone new to game with, someone new to go to a wrestling show with, someone new to watch anime with and someone new to travel with. These smaller friendships often overlap over time until you have a genuine social circle full of new faces. Trying to find “your people” all at once can feel overwhelming; building one connection at a time is more realistic.Coming up with a 90-day friendship plan
