With their newly graduated daughter and contented life together, Jessica Share and Aaron Long are like any well-established, middle-aged couple.Yet ask them ‘How did you meet?’ and that simple inquiry elicits a deep intake of breath.For their relationship history is anything but conventional. How do you explain that you met the love of your life 12 years after he anonymously donated sperm to you?Theirs is a story of the most extraordinary twists of fate that led two strangers – parents to a child one of them had never met – to the happiest of endings.‘It still blows my mind that we did this all backwards, a baby coming a decade before we even met, let alone fell in love,’ says Jessica, 50, a digital PR writer.Aaron, 60, agrees, adding: ‘When I donated sperm as a young man, I never could have imagined that this is where life would take me.’Jessica always knew that she wanted to be a mother, but when she started making plans aged 25, it was in the context of a same-sex relationship, with her then partner Kelly.And, rather ironically given how things turned out, for Jessica there was one non-negotiable. ‘I’d heard that the courts had given shared custody rights to a donor, even though he hadn’t been involved at all,’ she says. ‘So I was adamant. It had to be someone totally anonymous.’This was in 2004, when home DNA tests seemed like science fiction, so Jessica assumed that any children she conceived might never know their biological father. Jessica Share used an anonymous sperm donor to have a child with her then partner Kelly, as she had fears a known donor might try to get custody rights one day Jessica recalls that Aaron's 'work as a writer, musician and taxi driver also struck a chord' when looking through the sperm bank catalogue‘But I’d grown up with a single mum, have never known who my father was and didn’t struggle with that,’ she says. ‘I know that some adopted children are desperate to know their biological relatives. But my fear about using a known donor was stronger.’Having decided that Jessica would be the one to get pregnant, the couple chose a sperm bank that enabled them to do their own insemination. Soon, they were looking through a catalogue of donors.‘Back then the information was very limited – some medical information, a paragraph on their interests and a list of physical characteristics. Not even a photo,’ Jessica says. But one profile caught their eye.‘This man had a masters in creative writing, which stood out among all the medical student donors.‘His hobbies were music and sports, and with the description of brown, wavy hair, we felt like a child would be a physical match with us.’His work as a writer, musician and taxi driver also struck a chord. ‘We both felt like here was a man who was creative and did his own thing.’ At £112 per vial, they decided to go for it. In the end it took seven months, 14 vials and £1,568 before they got a positive pregnancy test.‘We were overjoyed,’ says Jessica, who was then 28. ‘Close friends and family who’d known what we were doing were also happy for us.’As the months passed, the donor stayed in Jessica’s mind. ‘I imagined this free-spirited twentysomething out there writing a novel about the passengers in the back of his cab.’Alice was born in 2005, and Jessica instantly fell in love. Nine months later, having bought more of the same donor’s sperm, Kelly got pregnant, and in 2007 Iris was born. The couple had their perfect family.Sadly, however, it didn’t last. When Alice was three and her sister was one, Kelly told Jessica their relationship was over.For seven years the pair shared custody of the girls, but then Kelly broke off contact and took Iris with her – and Jessica and Alice have not seen either of them since.‘My heartbreak at being suddenly separated from my youngest daughter was unbearable,’ says Jessica. ‘Alice was completely devastated.’A year later, aged 11, Alice asked for a home DNA test for Christmas.‘I wasn’t totally surprised,’ says Jessica. ‘My mum would talk about our Cornish background and Alice wanted to find out more about her genetic heritage.’Jessica thought it was unlikely that Alice would find a close relative, certainly not her biological dad.As Alice was a minor, the email with the results landed in Jessica’s inbox six weeks later, in January 2017. ‘I excitedly called Alice over. She was disappointed that her heritage countries didn’t reveal anything interesting. Then we looked at the relatives’ page [where the website will flag any matches between you and other registered users].There it was: “Aaron Long: 50 per cent [shared DNA]. Father.” Below it, a boy’s name with “25 per cent [shared DNA]. Half-brother.” Aaron Long's profile caught Jessica's eye as she said 'the description of brown, wavy hair' meant she 'felt like a child would be a physical match' Alice was born in 2005 and her sister Iris was born in 2007, with the same donor – but just a few years later, Jessica and Kelly's relationship broke down‘My instant reaction wasn’t one of panic or excitement. It was surprise; I simply couldn’t believe that we’d so easily found this man we knew so little about.’Jessica began to research everything she could about Aaron. ‘I was in mamma bear mode, determined to protect Alice at all costs,’ she says.She knew the year Aaron had donated sperm – 1994 – because it was written on one of the vials, so she could guess at his year of birth.Adding in his master’s degree and name, she was immediately directed to Aaron’s LinkedIn page and discovered he lived only five hours away from their home in Oregon, on the west coast of the US.Turning to Facebook, she then scrolled through his profile and clicked through some childhood photos he’d recently shared. ‘I stared in disbelief at a picture of what looked like my daughter with a bowl haircut from the 1960s. I instantly got chills. This was, without a doubt, Alice’s biological father.’But what to do with this information? ‘I told myself that Aaron had donated sperm and taken a DNA test. The fact he had biological children surely wouldn’t be a shock to him. I just needed to send him a message and see what happened next.’Sending a message via the DNA website, Jessica explained that her daughter matched his DNA and said she was available if he wanted to exchange family photos. Aaron still remembers receiving that message: ‘At first, I was confused, as it came from Alice’s account.‘Once I realised that it was her mother writing, it made sense. I was more curious about Alice than I was about Jessica – that came later after we’d begun messaging.’By the time Jessica woke the next morning, Aaron had replied.‘I was so relieved to read his chatty, friendly message. I was reassured at how open and honest he was being,’ she says. Aaron told her he had first donated sperm at the age of 28. Now a fund developer at a non-profit organisation, he recalls that he didn’t give the consequences much thought at the time.‘I’d seen an advert in a newspaper, asking men to help infertile couples,’ he says. ‘It was £30 a time and I donated twice a week for a year, making £3,000.‘I’d recently graduated, taught English in Tenerife for a year and returned to America. Moving back in with my mum, I got the quickest job I could, as a taxi driver, and donating sperm was just a way to boost my income. Back then, having kids wasn’t a particular life goal of mine. I was donating for money, and it was easy.’In the years that followed, he says: ‘If someone asked if I had children, I’d sometimes joke that I might have. But there was no way of possibly knowing and so it hardly ever crossed my mind.’His own relationship history? ‘My romantic life had never been terribly successful,’ he says. ‘I’d have been happy to have children if the moment happened. It just never did.’Then came the explosion in at-home DNA tests. Aaron says: ‘One day in 2015 I saw an advert for a test and was instantly intrigued. Should I take one and see what turns up? I procrastinated for months. In 2016 I went for it, wanting to satisfy my curiosity and to give any children a chance to find me if they wanted to.’When his results instantly connected him with a son, Aaron was shocked. ‘After Googling him, I sent a short message, and he replied with “Hi dad!”. When he told me that he’d found four other half-siblings I was speechless. I went from having no children to one child to five in the space of just a few minutes.’Soon after that, Jessica got in touch about child number six.As she and Aaron got to know more about each other, the connections between them mounted up. Aaron had spent years in a band, for example, visiting the town that Alice had been growing up in.‘It was wild to think that we could have crossed on the street, or been in the same supermarket, with no idea that the other even existed,’ says Jessica. ‘We had so much to talk about, and it was fascinating to share the lives we’d led since I’d conceived Alice.‘It felt almost as if we’d had a relationship while never having met one another. He told me about living with his mother, who had Alzheimer’s, and the way he wrote about the children that he had found was kind and open.’ Today, Aaron and Jessica are very happily settled and plan to get married, while Alice is now 21 and has just graduated from university Jessica messaged Aaron to explain that her daughter matched his DNA and asked if he wanted to exchange family photos, which was met with his chatty, friendly responseAaron, too, was enjoying messaging Jessica – who was ‘smart, funny, and beautiful’. By this point, Jessica was dating men as well as women. As the months passed, Jessica felt a spark but firmly pushed it aside.‘This was all about Alice,’ she says. ‘I wasn’t going to take even the smallest risk of blowing her relationship with her father.’After four months of messaging, Aaron said he would be meeting two of his biological children, who were 21 and 20, for the first time at his home two months later as part of a documentary about being a sperm donor.Why didn’t Alice and Jessica come, too, he suggested, and then maybe they could spend time together afterwards?‘Driving there, I was definitely nervous,’ says Jessica. ‘I felt like I knew Aaron, but we’d only actually spoken on the phone a few times. I knew that if, at any point, the vibes were off I would whisk Alice away.‘But I was also really intrigued to finally meet him. I wanted to see how he moved, his gestures, would they be like Alice’s?’Jessica was sitting behind the camera crew the next day, watching Alice and her two new half-siblings chat on a sofa, when Aaron walked in and joined them. ‘It was surreal,’ she says, ‘The cameras rolled as the four of them answered questions and talked. Then Aaron looked over, caught my eye and we both laughed.’‘It was such a nice, comforting moment,’ Aaron says. ‘Here was someone to share the absurdity of it all.’ After filming ended, the pair hugged. ‘It lasted for a really long time but didn’t feel strange,’ says Jessica. ‘It was like we’d known each other for ever.’There was a party that evening to celebrate Aaron’s biological children, attended by his many friends, including his exes. ‘Seeing friends from every stage of his life, and how much they loved him, made me like and trust Aaron even more,’ says Jessica.‘A few days later, the two of us took a walk after dinner and we sat talking about everything from our lives to our dreams.‘My other relationship had already ended. But I kept coming back to my fears, refusing to take a chance and possibly ruin this for Alice.’For Aaron, who calls that evening walk their first date, there were no such worries: ‘The whole time was wonderful, and so was Jessica.’ And just when it was time to go home, fate stepped in. An apartment in Aaron’s building in Seattle became empty. Would Jessica be interested in being his neighbour?Jessica said ‘yes’. A few weeks later, they had their first kiss. Jessica says: ‘Part of me thought, “This is wild, I’m kissing the anonymous sperm donor that I picked out of a catalogue 12 years ago.” But in another way, it just made so much sense. Aaron was a wonderful, caring man who I was falling for. In that way it wasn’t strange at all.’Alice’s possible reaction to this development was at the front of Jessica’s mind. ‘But when she did walk in on us kissing one day soon after, her only response was a very teenage eye roll and a very quick exit. She was completely cool about the whole thing.’And friends and family were supportive from the start.Now, Aaron, who is connected with 22 biological children but knows there might be many more (based on the number of donations, he estimates it’s likely over 60), has never regretted his decision to donate. ‘It’s brought so many wonderful people into my life. But it’s also shown me that family is so much more than DNA. It’s the people you choose to be with, whether you share blood or not,’ he says.Apart from Alice, he is in regular contact with three other children and maintains an occasional connection with a few more.Jessica and Aaron moved in together in 2019 and are very happily settled, with plans to get married eventually. Alice is now 21 and has just graduated from university. Her relationship with Aaron has deepened over the years, though she considers him more of a stepdad.‘Both are extremely easygoing and thrifty. And they share the same smile. They both love writing, too,’ she says. ‘And while I love Taylor Swift, they’d much rather watch old Hollywood movies together.’Jessica admits she has moments when she forgets when, exactly, Aaron came into their lives.‘I’ll casually reminisce to him about something Alice did when she was eight, then suddenly remember that he wasn’t there.‘I’ll never know why I chose Aaron from the catalogue that day. But I’m forever grateful that I did.’Kelly and Iris’s names have been changed.