Picture this: You’ve midway through a difficult conversation or negotiation. The other person has just about pushed you to your limit, maybe with an off-hand comment or a string of subtle digs.
Your heart is racing. Adrenaline surges. Your brain calls to mind that perfect zinger. Just as the words start to leave your lips, a little voice in your head says, “Maybe don’t.”
This comment halfway out of your mouth is almost guaranteed to take you down a path of no return. But the train has already left the station. How do you pull back and pivot without looking weak, awkward or scatter-brained?
In high-stakes negotiations and difficult conversations, whether in your personal or professional life, it’s easy to obsess over saying the right thing. But as CEO of the American Negotiation Institute and a communication expert, I’ve found we often overlook a more powerful skill: knowing when not to say what you’re about to say.
I call this the 99% rule: You can get 99% of a conversation perfectly right, but the remaining 1% — in the form of a single, impulsive, unfiltered comment — has the power to ruin an entire deal or moment.
