The first lady has put the Barbra Streisand effect in overdrive with a PR nightmare of her own making

You’ve probably heard of the Barbra Streisand effect: the phenomenon where attempts to censor information end up drawing more attention to it.

Now we might soon be referencing the Melania Trump effect: the phenomenon where holding a surprise press conference to state that you did not have a relationship with a dead paedophile, and would like people to please stop speculating about the matter, immediately causes people to start speculating about the matter.

On Thursday, for reasons that nobody can quite understand, the first lady decided to tell the world to ignore all the rumours circulating about her connections to Jeffrey Epstein because she “never had a relationship” with the late sex offender or his accomplice Ghislaine Maxwell. Yes, she’d met Epstein, but she barely knew him. Yes, there are photos of Epstein, Maxwell and the Trumps together, but those aren’t a big deal.

Trump did acknowledge writing a friendly email to Maxwell, signed “Love, Melania”, but brushed that off. “I [have] never been friends with Epstein,” she insisted. “I am not Epstein’s victim. Epstein did not introduce me to Donald Trump.” She also called on Congress to take sworn testimony in a public hearing from Epstein victims. (Maybe you could have just asked your husband to get that done, Melania? I hear he’s pretty high up in politics.)