Being codependent is often seen as a bad thing. But a new book makes the case for ‘healthy dependency’

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any of us desire deeper relationships. What we don’t always agree on is how close is too close. Dating advice often casts intimacy as a tightrope – pull back too much, or push for more. Either move is read as a red flag. Between discussions of incompatible attachment styles, the importance of boundaries and the dangers of love-bombing, it’s easy to get the impression there’s a correct level of closeness to aim for.

In truth, intimacy isn’t one-size-fits-all and comfort levels vary – not just between individuals, but across their relationships.

In her new book, The Balancing Act, therapist and relationships expert Nedra Glover Tawwab challenges the most pernicious myths about connection, distinguishes between healthy and unhealthy dependency in a relationship, and shows how we can learn to lean on other people without losing ourselves.