Instead of seeing etiquette as a set of categorical rules, we should recognise that poor form can actually have good consequences
M
any people are out there labouring under the impression that lateness is always terribly rude. I am here to tell you this is totally wrong. There are situations when, yes, it is rude. There are situations when it basically doesn’t matter. But there are also situations when being late is actually the height of good manners and decorum.
If you are invited to dinner, especially by a person who you can sense is an inexperienced cook or host, you should endeavour to be late. By at least 10 minutes I would say. But, honestly, if your host is a 25-year-old who has sent you a message saying, “I’m going to try making this :)” and then attached a picture of an elaborate recipe with two separate kinds of molasses, then I would say half an hour is probably best.
Their oven gloves will have caught fire and they’ll have had to sort that out. They’ll forget to give themselves time to shower. They will have started a step and realised they’re missing key equipment and then they’ll have directed a piercing scream at the recipe book, and so forth. When you arrive half an hour late they will be so frantically grateful they’ll try to lick you. Just say, “Oh no, that’s fine, no need” if they do.
