The holidays bring a lot of perks — time off work, snow days, cheesy Hallmark movies and spending time with family members who you may not get to see much throughout the year. The last one can be a bit of a double-edged sword, however.
Although you love your relatives, there’s something about a large gathering ― combined with being back in a house where you were once a different person ― that can make you more stressed than normal. Constant questions about your personal life and your job or comments about your eating habits or body may pop up. You might (strongly) oppose their political views. You may feel pressure to get along when you’re just not feeling it.
If you’re equal parts excited about and dreading family time, you’re not a bad daughter, son, sibling or cousin; you’re just human. There are psychological (and unconscious) reasons this happens. Here’s what makes you feel that way, plus some expert tips on how to navigate sticky conversations and prevent your family from pushing your buttons this season.
Being around family causes old dynamics to resurface
One of the most common reasons being around family can stress you out is that although you’re not a child anymore, you’re suddenly back in that environment. That can cause a regression in behavior that’s reflected in yourself and in the way people treat you, said Joseph Cilona, a licensed clinical psychologist and personal coach based in New York.
