Are you often feeling anxious, sad, panicked or straight-up mad? There’s a major reason for that.You are likely operating outside of your “window of tolerance,” a term that was coined by psychiatrist Daniel Siegel, Becca Moravec, a licensed professional counselor, trauma therapist and founder of Full Bloom Counseling in Denver, told HuffPost.The window of tolerance is “a way to understand how our nervous system handles stress,” said Emma Shandy Anway, a licensed marriage and family therapist based in California and owner of ESA Counseling Services.When you’re within your window of tolerance, you’re able to respond appropriately when tough or annoying things come up and can manage any stress and anxiety, added Carly Costello, an EMDR therapist in West Virginia.“When we are in the window of tolerance, we are in homeostasis, we’re grounded ... we can think clearly, our emotions are not feeling too high or overwhelming,” Shandy Anway said.But, when we’re overwhelmed, we’re either pushed up outside of the window or down outside of the window, she said.“You can think about the up zone as going into hyper-arousal. So ... freak-out mode. I’m angry, I’m anxious, I’m panicked, I’m in the red,” Shandy Anway explained. On the downside of things is hypo-arousal, when you’re disconnected, numb, frozen, dissociated or shut down, she added.Your window of tolerance isn’t about not feeling tough emotions, but is instead about understanding how to feel them while also moving through life in a calm and regulated way, noted Moravec.“You can think and feel at the same time. I can feel deeply sad about something and not be so dysregulated that I’m yelling and screaming and crying and taking it out on everybody around me,” Moravec said.In an always-on, stressful world, it’s hard to remain in your window of tolerance, but there are ways to do so and ways to expand your calm zone. Here’s what to know:Society makes it really hard to stay in your window of tolerance.It’ll come as no surprise that many folks regularly function outside of their window of tolerance. Thanks to a stressful political landscape, intense work and parenting demands, and a culture of doomscrolling, it’s hard to feel at ease.“As Americans, we live in an incredibly stressful, toxic, patriarchal society where we glorify the grind culture and the hustle,” said Shandy Anway.“The day-to-day life tends to be stressful, and then the overall environment, the governing structures, are feeling more and more unsafe for people,” she added. “So, in general, I would say it is more common than not for people to have a lower window of tolerance right now, simply because we are existing in an environment that is so inherently stressful.”“Healing happens when we have new experiences that let us revisit painful memories with new support and new outcomes.- Becca Moravec, licensed professional counselor and trauma therapistIf you are often anxious, sad or angry, you’re certainly not alone, and it’s also linked to how many people were raised.“We were modeled ... by earlier generations, to stay outside of the window of tolerance in the opposite way, in the not thinking or the not feeling way,” said Moravec.You may have been told to “get over” a tough situation or to “act rationally” instead of feeling your emotions, for example. Stress is expected and modeled in our society, added Moravec. So, how would we not be feeling that?Some people have a large window of tolerance, while others have a small one.Some people have a big window of tolerance and can easily deal with stressors, while other people have a much smaller window that results in them being set off easily.“It is unique to the blueprint of your own nervous system,” said Shandy Anway.“So, if you are somebody who lives a really chill life, maybe you don’t have a stressful job, maybe you live by the ocean, maybe you grew up with [a] securely attached childhood, you’re going to have a really big window of tolerance,” she explained.If you’re late to work and hit traffic, your ability to stay in your window of tolerance is high, she added.Conversely, “there’s been a lot of studies done on people who come from extreme childhood trauma. They grow up to be adults with very, very short windows,” Shandy Anway said. Meaning that morning traffic could cause this person to get mad, stressed and snap at everyone around them.Life experiences and supports you have (or don’t have) also impact how big your window of tolerance is, said Costello.Malte Mueller via Getty ImagesWhen you're outside of your window of tolerance, you may be quick to anger or quick to panic.There are ways to expand your window of tolerance so you are calm more often.Simply understanding the term “window of tolerance” and bringing it into your vocabulary can benefit your nervous system, said Moravec.“We can be thinking about, am I in it? Am I out of it? And be more conscious of it, which, in and of itself, helps expand the window of tolerance,” Moravec said.Beyond acknowledging the concept, you can work to expand your window of tolerance by practicing mindfulness, whether that’s meditation, journaling, mindfulness exercises such as deep breathing, putting your phone away or going for a walk, she added. It’s important to do these grounding exercises or mindfulness practices daily, said Costello. They all add up to turn into something calming and window-of-tolerance-expanding. Shandy Anway agreed and referred to these everyday habits as “scaffolding in my daily life to start stretching that window.” “Just finding something that you really connect to that helps you feel grounded, whether that would be a free YouTube meditation or going to yoga, moving your body, these little things that we all know about but sometimes we don’t put it into practice, those things can really help,” Costello added.“I think healing happens when we have new experiences that let us revisit painful memories with new support and new outcomes,” Moravec noted.Meaning, if you had a bad travel experience a few years ago and haven’t gone anywhere since, a new, good travel experience can help shift your mindset on travel altogether. There are many reasons it’s important to be in your window of tolerance.For some people, staying in their window of tolerance is no easy feat. As stated above, trauma can unfairly shrink a window, making one more accustomed to feelings such as sadness, panic and anger.But it’s important to take steps to expand your window of tolerance, and your brain and body will only benefit.“When we’re more regulated and we exist longer in the window of tolerance, we’re going to have healthier relationships with ourselves, with other people, with our community,” said Moravec.If you spend too much time in hypo-arousal, for example, “then we might see someone being angry or grumpy or doing relational things that keep people at arm’s length and don’t allow for close, connected relationship,” Moravec added.It’s impossible to go through life completely within your window of tolerance; feeling upset or down is part of life. What matters, though, is getting back to homeostasis when you are having an off day.“I think it’s really important that people don’t get down on themselves when they notice they’re outside of the window of tolerance because a healed person is still going to go outside of the window of tolerance,” said Moravec.You won’t be even-keeled all the time, but instead of getting more activated when you’re outside of the window, focus on compassion and kindness to bring yourself back to your place of calm.