METAIRIE, La. — At first, the initial jolt of the news shook him to Brandon Staley to his core. It tried to break him.“It’s very difficult to explain to people when you do lose a dream in front of the whole world,” Staley told The Athletic, as he sought the words to describe being fired by the Los Angeles Chargers as the franchise cleaned house in the middle of a brutal 2023 season.Now in his second season as defensive coordinator of the New Orleans Saints, Staley says he has rebuilt himself since everything he’d worked so hard for in his career all came crashing down. Not only had Staley been fired during the third season of his head coaching tenure, but he was ridiculed as the standalone punching bag in a news cycle that feeds off bloodlust. His harshest critics sharpened their pitchforks.“We lost on Thursday night, the only game playing,” Staley said of a 63-21 blowout to the Las Vegas Raiders that pushed the Chargers to 5-9, ensuring Staley’s worst record in his three seasons as head coach. “And the next day, it’s over. And everyone is laughing at you. Everybody. Competition brings humility out of you. Part of living your dream is knowing you have to fight really hard for it. What’s hard for everyone to understand is that living your dream comes with moments like that.”As Staley worked through the heartbreak of his career, he was reminded of the resilience that came with finding his way through the two darkest points of his life: his mother’s death and his own cancer battle. He was reminded that if he was honest with himself, relied on the people around him and pushed forward, he could pry meaning from the pain and come out on the other side a better version of himself.“After all three of those major life events,” Staley said, “there was a strength and a confidence, a poise and composure, an energy that comes when you face something that big. After all three of those things, I came out just such a different, better version of me and headed toward something special.”Why Saints fans are thankful for Drew BreesJohnny Sweet‘Still living a dream’Staley lost his mother, Linda Staley, on Valentine’s Day in 2004 after her nine-year fight against breast cancer. Though she only lived to 47, for Staley, her time has proven everlasting, as he believes the lessons she bestowed on Brandon and his two brothers have continued to shine through their everyday lives.The memory of the strength of Linda’s voice may have never been more impactful than in January 2007, when a 24-year-old Staley himself was diagnosed with cancer. He had just finished his first year of coaching as a graduate assistant at Northern Illinois when the medical team at Cleveland Medical Center diagnosed him with Hodgkin lymphoma.Linda had struck down her cancer once before it metastasized. Staley’s father, Bruce, has beaten thyroid and prostate cancer, so they’ve shared victories, too.And this time, it was Staley’s turn.“I really believe she lived long enough to make sure my brothers and I were going to be all right, that we were going to be the people she raised,” Staley said. “I truly believe that. We’re all doing exactly what we’re capable of doing right now.“I joked when I became head coach that I’m from the Bruce and Linda Staley coaching tree, but I meant that sincerely. A lot can be traced back to my parents.”Falling back on the lessons from his parents is how he processed the loss of his dream job after being fired by the Chargers.“(But) I’m still living a dream,” said Staley, who had a 19-15 record through two seasons, including the Chargers’ second playoff berth in nine years before all that good seemed to be washed away by a frustrating 2023 campaign. “That may have been a dream opportunity, but I’m still living my dream right now. A big part of being able to live your dream is really fighting hard for it. That’s what I learned about coaching. I love the game. I lost my job with the Chargers, but I didn’t lose my opportunity to coach. I love coaching. I love the game. I’m still getting to do that.“Now, what I get to show is that I’m better than I’ve ever been. That’s the balance that’s hard for people to understand. It’s not always a poetic ending, where you just crush it and don’t ever look back. That’s something I’m well aware of from my personal life. But now, from a professional standpoint, when you fail and you have to face it, when you’re confronted with it, there’s actually an energy that comes from getting to the other side. You can be better than you’ve ever been.”‘A grace and a glow’Long before he shot from Division III John Carroll University to the Chicago Bears in 2017 and long before becoming a first-time head coach in 2021, Staley’s scars had a way of sharing his story.He was 12 when his mother was diagnosed with cancer. She underwent a stem cell transplant and had a clean bill of health for a couple of years before it infiltrated her bones and metastasized. Staley can smile knowing her quality of life was strong for most of her battle, and he wistfully beams when he dances with the idea of making her proud.“I saw a lot about where the human body and spirit can go,” Staley said. “I saw a lot about community and people who support one another. I saw what it meant to fight and to live the right way. She had a grace and a glow that very few could have throughout something that tough. It’s helped me every day of my life since. Every day of my life.”Staley needed the same spirit when he began to feel off in October 2006. It started with the fatigue, which he dismissed as a lifestyle change as a coach. But his body wasn’t knocking loudly enough, so Staley then endured fevers, night sweats and eventually masses on his neck, throat and chest.Unable to ignore his symptoms any longer, Staley visited the campus clinic after the season, but he was quickly redirected to the hospital. By January, the biopsy confirmed his lymphoma diagnosis.“Imagine that,” Staley deadpanned.Staley underwent six months of chemotherapy, but he returned to the team during spring ball. He finished treatment with six weeks of radiation, waking up at 5 a.m. every weekday to drive to the University of Illinois Medical Center before returning to campus in time for 8 a.m. staff meetings.He never lost the passion for his coaching dream while harnessing inspiration from his mother to stave off cancer.“I’ve had big life moments,” Staley said. “That shows you exactly what you need to do and how you need to do it. It brings out a version of you that would be impossible to come out otherwise.”‘The beginning of something’Staley coached outside linebackers for Vic Fangio’s Bears and Denver Broncos from 2017 to 2019 before Los Angeles Rams head coach Sean McVay picked him up at 4:57 a.m. — yes, he remembers the time — at the Four Seasons in Thousand Oaks, Calif., to interview for his defensive coordinator vacancy.Staley nailed the 12-hour interview and then the bigger audition for the rest of the league, as he led the 2020 Rams to the No. 1 defense in points and yards. Staley parlayed that success into the Chargers job, one of the most coveted of the seven coaching vacancies because of the presence of young quarterback Justin Herbert and the opening of SoFi Stadium.Staley helped guide Herbert to an historic start to his career, and the Chargers went from 9-8 in Staley’s first season to the playoffs with a 10-7 record in his second. However, both seasons ended in agony on national TV. In 2021, the Chargers fell to the Raiders as time expired in overtime in the Sunday night regular-season finale with a playoff berth on the line. The next year, the Chargers gave away a 27-0 advantage to the Jacksonville Jaguars, who mounted the third-biggest comeback in postseason history.Things fell apart in 2023, with injuries ravaging his roster and the Chargers defense crumbling around him.Staley tried to live on the cutting edge his first couple of seasons, as he became one of the early faces of the fourth-down movement before it became in vogue. His aggressive mindset made him a frequent target of criticism, but it was successful for a time. The Chargers ranked fourth in fourth-down attempts (63) and conversion rate (58.7 percent; league average was 51.9 percent) during his first two seasons. Staley’s Chargers converted more fourth downs (22) in 2021 than Dan Campbell’s Lions (21).“We were not going to be afraid of meeting a big moment and betting on ourselves,” Staley said.Of course, Staley would like to have some of those bold calls back, whether it was the decision to go for it or the call itself. On a grander scale, he’s identified plenty of things worth changing from that first go-round.Some of that realization has come with time. Staley became Kyle Shanahan’s assistant head coach in 2024 with the San Francisco 49ers, an opportunity that yielded the perfect period for reflection. With a new vantage point of the job, as well as an appreciation for it, Staley learned a ton simply by observing one of the NFL’s longest-tenured coaches.He also sought out advice from Bill Belichick, Pete Carroll, Mike Shanahan, Josh McDaniels, Steve Kerr and Mike Brown, along with CEOs of Fortune 500 companies. He learned from 49ers general manager John Lynch, as well as Saints GM Mickey Loomis and his cadre of former department heads on staff.“It was just being honest with myself about where I needed to go — not looking at anybody else but myself and taking full responsibility,” Staley said. “It was very clear to me where I needed to go to improve. Thankfully, I had the time and space going to San Francisco to figure all that out because, in truth, I needed it.”Like any first-time head coach, Staley’s head was spinning at a speed he’d never experienced. He knows now the job requires an emphasis on slowing down.“I would have a lot more poise and composure in terms of knowing when to push and when to pull,” Staley said of getting another shot at being a head coach. “I was trying to push it, and I was trying to get us there as fast as we could. When you have more experience, you know when to do both of those things. You just have a better feel and understanding, and that’s in all aspects of being a leader.“That’s why the next time, I just have so much more experience now — I didn’t have any back then. I could have done a better job. I know for a fact I would do a better job just with more turns at it, living through more — little decisions and big decisions.”Staley has also reunited with Kellen Moore in New Orleans. Moore, who was Staley’s offensive coordinator with the Chargers in 2023, hired Staley in 2025 when he took over the Saints. Like Staley’s relationship with McVay, he’s reinforced his belief in the value of high-end chemistry on staff.Their process has shown signs of encouragement, with quarterback Tyler Shough’s development as a rookie, while Staley’s defense made a big leap in the second half. From Week 10 to the end of the season, the Saints allowed 17.5 points per game — the fifth-best mark in the NFL in that span — as they closed with a 5-3 record. With added success, Staley hopes to draw interview requests for head coaching vacancies sooner rather than later.“In order to excel at the top part of it, you have to be with the right people,” Staley said. “That’s easier said than done, but you’ve got to start with the leadership.”That has rung true in other areas, too. Relationships matter across the board. Staley regrets not asking for more help when he was with the Chargers.“I kind of bunkered in,” Staley said. “I was trying so hard to get it right within our team that I think I needed to open myself up more to people who had a lot more of what I was missing, which was experience. If I had done that from the beginning, of (acknowledging), ‘Hey, I don’t have a lot of experience, but there’s no one who is going to learn faster than I will.’ … I could have done a better job of surrounding myself with more of what I was missing.“And not just within the Chargers. I’m talking about within my life. It would have helped me. It would have slowed me down. Maybe I was on the right track, and I needed to worry less. Maybe I was thinking I was on the right track about something, totally convinced I was and, man, no, you really weren’t. I could have done a better job with that, opened myself up to more people. That’s definitely something when you look back, you say, ‘Man, because things were moving so fast, you missed that.’”Staley has given himself some grace, too. And he’s grown to appreciate the humility that comes from job loss.Life is finite, Staley learned long ago. So are jobs in the NFL. The experience of losing hold of something he held so dear helped Staley better connect with players, the vast majority of whom rarely have more than a week or even a day of job security. And with Staley’s opinion shaping certain roster decisions, the extra touch of humanity can make a difference.Take it as another lesson from Linda Staley. They’re all intertwined by now.“After what I went through in L.A., I knew I could bounce back,” Staley said. “And I knew I had to. … Hopefully, those three years as a head coach have helped me for my new path. That’s how I’ve approached it.“This is the beginning of something. I’ve got to use those three years. As special as they were, as tough and impossible as it was at the end, I’ve got to use that the right way.”That’s a man speaking from experience.