Thousands of disappointed students have always found a way forwardWhen it comes to supporting a student when the results – good, bad or indifferent – come back, it can be hard to know what to do. Photograph: Getty Images Peter McGuireThu Aug 20 2026 - 06:00 • 5 MIN READIn 2025, 51 per cent of students secured their top college preference, while 80 per cent got one of their top three choices.That is, of course, good news, but it also means that there will, as always, be many disappointed students. Parents tend to be well briefed on how to support their exam student, with advice aplenty on good nutrition, sleep and avoiding a deep postmortem. But when it comes to supporting a student when the results – good, bad or indifferent – come back, it can be hard to know what to do. This is especially the case when a student didn’t do as they hoped.Last year, Kayleigh McNamara was the disability officer with the Irish Second-Level Students’ Union (ISSU). “I have lived experience of being disabled in the education system,” she says. “I did a PLC course in social studies and youth work because I had chronic health issues that impacted my ability to go to school in fifth and sixth year. I sat a reduced Leaving Cert, which allowed me to focus on my health.“In this time, I noticed that people will say that health should be the number one priority, but they also treat the Leaving Cert like it is the be-all-and-end-all. Because of the PLC, I didn’t have to worry as much about CAO points.”McNamara is now about to start a college course, which she entered through the Post-Leaving Certificate route. But her experience gave her an insight into how there are now many more options for school-leavers, with different routes to third-level outside of the CAO as well as new options that don’t revolve around going to college at all – and how parents don’t need to panic if all doesn’t go as planned.“The system is complicated, and it can be hard to wrap your head around,” McNamara says. “And sometimes, especially if it’s the first exam year for any of their children, they don’t know what to expect. Most parents sat their Leaving Cert when the CAO was really the only route to college, so they might not be aware of newer options and college entry routes.Former disability officer with the Irish Second-Level Students’ Union (ISSU), Kayleigh McNamara “Parents might expect that their child will get the results, calculate their points and then know immediately if they have their preferred course. But this is not the case, especially if they have near or around the same points as the course was last year; this is because points can go up as well as down – especially stressful around high-points courses like medicine which can sometimes fluctuate by a point or two. So it’s a good idea to be prepared for a few stressful days between results and CAO round one offers.”And round one is often just the start of the college process, rather than the end of the Leaving Cert process. This is because when round one offers are issued, students have the opportunity to accept, reject or request to defer. If they reject the offer, they will not be issued another. Some students will reject the offer because they have decided to take a year out, study abroad, choose a PLC or repeat in the hope of getting a more preferred course next year. Students who filled out both the level six/seven and level eight course preferences on their CAO form will, with enough points and matriculation requirements under their belt, choose one. This leaves the other course free for another student to take up.Further rounds of offers will be made, and some students may be well ensconced into a college course when their preferred choice suddenly becomes available. Betty McLaughlin, a former president of the Institute of Guidance Counsellors, is a guidance counsellor in Enfield Community School. She also runs a private practice in Mullingar. “It is important for parents to sit down with their child and see what is offered,” she says.“Does their child want to take the offer, bearing in mind it may be the only offer they will get through the CAO? Accepting this offer does not take someone out of the competition if, say, they become entitled to an offer that is higher up on their list of preferences.”If the student is disappointed, McLaughlin urges parents not to dismiss them. “The very first thing to do is validate their feelings,” she says. “This is not the time for recriminations, to say, ‘I told you so’ or ‘you could have worked harder’. There’s no point in looking back, because nobody can go back.Betty McLaughlin is a guidance counsellor in Enfield Community School “Say that you can see how upset they are and that you are sorry for how they feel, and that the results don’t define them when there are so many options,” McLaughlin says.While it’s important for parents not to be dismissive, it is worth quietly bearing in mind that thousands of disappointed students have always found a way forward and few carry that disappointment into later life – think of your own wider circle, and how almost nobody is still lamenting that lost Leaving Cert, because they found a way forward. And, these days, more and more students get into college in later CAO rounds, find an alternative entry route or even come to love whatever lower offer they go on to study. “Give them 24 hours to digest it all before having a chat,” says McLaughlin. “Look into other options, such as apprenticeship, PLCs, traineeships, deferral, the National Tertiary Office courses (courses that are not adjudicated on CAO points and where students begin with a year in higher education before moving into third-level), study abroad and more.“School guidance counsellors can still help, and the National Parents’ Council runs an advice and help line where students and parents/ guardians can get advice on their next steps.”Meanwhile, McNamara says that students need their parents to be supportive and not jump straight into fixer mode. “Parents need to take a breath and a step back. Remember that so much work has gone into these exams, and that it can be hard when things don’t turn out as hoped. If your daughter or son is disappointed, don’t ask how their friends and neighbours got on. Even if you’re well-meaning, it’s not the best thing to say to someone who is upset. “Ultimately, parents can turn themselves inside out figuring out how to help, but just being supportive and giving them space to figure out what’s next is the most helpful thing they can do,” McNamara says.McLaughlin has a final word for parents. “Now, as they start this next phase of their education, parents should take a step back, let their child take responsibility for their own learning, and let them know that you are there for them.”IN THIS SECTION