With the summer holidays upon us, families are spending more time with their children – and seeing how they’re developing up close. How can we tell if meltdowns and moaning are something to be concerned about? Here, Dr Marianne Trent, a clinical psychologist based in Coventry, host of the podcast Psychology, Actually and a mother of two, reveals the reassuring signs that show if a child is happy – and advises on how to manage whining and anxiety. Interview by Cara Lee
Being quietly content
Happiness isn’t constant – the Hollywood version looks quite different to how it feels in reality. Happiness can be feeling “in the middle” – not experiencing a low mood but not feeling euphoric either. That middle ground is a very safe place for us to be and it’s important to feel comfortable and accepting of ourselves being there, and for our children to be in that place. Happiness is on a spectrum, and the quiet and content moments are a big part of that picture.
That’s why as parents – over the school holidays especially – we shouldn’t feel the pressure to ram days together full of activities. Often children are happy to play at home, snuggle down together on the sofa or read a book in the garden. All of these things contribute to our wellbeing – it isn’t all about white knuckle rides at theme parks.
