“Why the hell isn’t that a red card?” That sums up the bevy of text messages that pinged into my phone immediately after Luke Jacobson had launched himself, off his feet in a totally reckless fashion, at Josh van der Flier. They were all from experienced, knowledgeable rugby people. I had no answer: I was busy asking myself exactly the same question.There was a high degree of danger when Jacobson struck van der Flier hard in the head with his elbow. It was in the egregious category. Although not picked up by referee Nic Berry it was identified by the TMO, Ben Whitehouse. Berry then decided it met the yellow card threshold. It did indeed, but the referee showed no interest in considering a straight red card, which Jacobson’s actions merited. Where do Ireland go from here? Listen | 46:37So, it went to the bunker official, Englishman Andrew Jackson, for adjudication. Surely, it would now, at least, become a 20-minute red card. But even that did not come to pass. Jackson found an escape route for the guilty party, decreeing that James Ryan had “jammed” the All Blacks player’s arm. Heavens above, where did that come from? It was a shocker of a call.Yes, brutal foul play is in the news again. Despite the 20-minute red card – and more likely because of it – hits to the head have not gone away. The Junior World Championship also had a headbutt, a truly horrendous effort by England’s Seb Kelly on South African Luan Giliomee. This one did receive a straight red from French referee Kevin Bralley, and it went to the foul play review committee for consideration. The written judgment tells us Kelly actually argued the toss on it, claiming he was moving in a clearing out action. That story was, of course, thrown out by the committee who, rightly, deemed the act to be deliberate. Having said that, it was astounding that they considered the headbutt to be mid-range in seriousness, which raises the question as to what must happen for it to be top-end. The 10-match suspension was then mitigated to six, an completely over-generous allowance when really six months was necessary for the punishment to fit the crime.Join our Irish Times Rugby WhatsApp communityGet the best of our writing in the Irish Times rugby community. Photograph: Henry Simpson/Inpho Join our Irish Times Rugby WhatsApp community and get our best rugby writing sent directly to your messages inbox. From provincial news to coverage of Ireland’s inaugural Nations Championship campaign, you won’t miss an update. Join here: https://chat.whatsapp.com/DaV5S7cDxWF0xDDILjarcwThen we had Italian Niccolò Cannone’s recent headbutt which, as with Jacobson, went to the bunker. It has resulted in a paltry four-match suspension. These incidents represent a major problem for the game and it needs to be sorted urgently. Instructions to referees to give straight reds for specific heinous offences, plus ensuring stricter, deterrent level sentences, would go a long way towards resolving things. But that will exist only in the land of my pipe dreams. Because, sadly for the sport, there are people at the top table who disagree completely.Referee Nic Berry shows a yellow card after Luke Jacobson's foul, but he could have shown a straight red. Photograph: Ben Brady/INPHO At Eden Park, if I were to say that Berry had a mixed performance then that opinion would be on the generous side of things. He was not the reason Ireland lost, but that doesn’t mean that he had a good game. He did not and has probably slipped down the ranking list based on this performance. New Zealand were simply better, faster, more powerful, more skilful; an error strewn, ill-disciplined, first half from Ireland didn’t help matters either. [ How has blatant illegality in the maul gone so far without being addressed? ]Then there was that moment: under rugby’s laws there are no own goals, but Stuart McCloskey’s wayward pass, which found its way along the ground to Will Jordan, was as close to putting the ball in your own net as you can get.Whitehouse is a proactive TMO, also intervening when he considered that Berry was mistaken in deciding that Quinn Tupaea had made a genuine attempt to catch the ball, rather than a deliberate knock-on. The referee said it was a two-handed attempted catch, but that was not the case. With the New Zealand player diving off his feet to desperately reach the ball, the penalty was justified. There is plenty of chat about reducing TMO involvement, but then coaches and players would have to accept mistakes more than they do at present. Damned if you do and damned if you don’t is probably where the whole TMO business sits just now.All camera angles were studied before the penalty was awarded to Ireland. Captain Dan Sheehan was perfectly within his rights to ask Berry where was the yellow card, which the offence called for. Tadhg Beirne would have been clean through, a definite line break beckoned. Berry will have lots of questions to answer; this one will be particularly uncomfortable.Ireland did have one stroke of good fortune from the referee. Jimmy O’Brien’s tackle in the air on Ruben Love bordered on a yellow card, but it didn’t get the scrutiny it should have.Andy Farrell might also ask Berry to explain his instructions, which clearly seemed to prevent Ireland from contesting possession and left Beirne looking particularly perplexed. It is a frustrating style of refereeing that clearly favours the team in possession, whereas a contest at the breakdown is a vital part of the game. And that leads to the next point: should preventative refereeing (aka coaching) be on the menu? The answer probably distils down to this: if there is no offence before the referee tells defending players to “leave it”, then it’s fair enough. But if the ball has already been slowed down, then there must be no prevention: it has to be a penalty or advantage. It won’t lead to a multitude of sanctions, but to a change in player behaviour and faster breakdown ball.What we do not want is non-stop instructions and advice to players. Berry gave us plenty, as did his loquacious compatriot Angus Gardner in Argentina against England. There are some referees who should remember that it’s not about them. Nobody has bought their ticket to watch the referee.