Trump card: “I didn’t ‌know that at the World Cup the fifth of July is now April Fool’s Day.” Belgium coach Rudi Garcia on being told that Fifa were allowing the United States’ Folarin Balogun play in their round of 16 game despite that red card in his previous outing. Gianni guff: “The American dream, president Trump, came to reality. We united the world in America. This is not just the greatest World Cup of all time, it is the greatest human, social and cultural event that mankind has ever witnessed.” The Infantino man going off on one again. Comfort breaks: “It’s got its uses when you are in the stadium. Being my age, it is a welcome break to go to the toilet.” Jürgen Klopp was no fan of hydration breaks – but he could see their benefit. Spain's Lamine Yamal and Argentina's Lionel Messi. Photograph: Charly Triballeau and Roberto Schmidt/AFP via Getty Images Slow burn: “I have to be honest, I was quite shocked by Van Dijk. Especially while turning. It is proving very difficult. A bit like a Boeing 747 turning.” Former Dutch international Rafael van der Vaart being a bit rude about Virgil’s mobility.Artists only: “It would be a mistake to compare him to Messi and Maradona; he’s young – but all these kind of players are geniuses, like Salvador Dalí, or Michelangelo.” Spain’s coach Luis de la Fuente failing to calm expectations of Lamine Yamal.Zut alors: “It is not a defeat, it is not an elimination – it is a humiliation! I feel ripped off, scammed, bamboozled, cuckolded. We delivered a catastrophic match on every level.” France old-boy Christophe Dugarry taking that defeat by Spain well.Cristiano Ronaldo after Portugal were knocked out of the World Cup by Spain. Photograph: Thomas Coex/AFP via Getty Images Don’t leave us this way: “You’re going to leave to go and witness the birth of your child – which, excuse me, is a disgusting moment – where the father is useless?! He just holds your hand and takes a photo! The baby will always be there!” L’Équipe’s TV presenter responding calmly to news that Belgium’s Jérémy Doku was considering returning home for the birth of his child. Daddy cam: “There wasn’t much ‌I could say, I just had to help her get him out. I’m completely exhausted.” A fatigued Leo Ostigard (Norway) after attending the birth of his child ... by, eh, video-link.Long in the tooth: “His ego is holding the team hostage. At this point, his aura is supporting him more than his legs. Continuing to start him is pure nostalgia-driven madness.” Zlatan Ibrahimovic politely suggesting that Cristiano Ronaldo should retire. Thomas Tuchel during England's semi-final defeat by Argentina. Photograph: Justin Setterfield/Getty Images Vamooooose!: “Tomorrow we play against the usurping pirates. Against the English, it’s always something more. It’s the Malvinas, it’s Diego ... it’s putting the brakes on the invaders! Go Argentina! Because until our last breath, we’re going to claim what’s ours!” Argentina’s vice-president Victoria Villarruel sounding quite up for that semi-final. Tuchel Trumped: “They took the lead, and they took their best player and put him in defence. But what do I know about coaching?” Donald Trump berating Thomas for his use of Harry Kane against Argentina. “Thank you for your attention to this matter,” Tuchel might have replied. Alive and kicking: “I don’t want to break bad news, but Messi’s father just died. Right in the middle of the World Cup. He’s going to have to leave.” TV presenter Florencia Peña, live on air in Argentina, bemoaning Messi’s Da’s timing. (Except he hadn’t died at all). Brazil's Neymar after their defeat by Norway. Photograph: Angela Weiss/AFP via Getty Images All over the map: “I could not point out where Bosnia is on a map. I don’t know the first thing about Bosnia, and I don’t wanna know. That’s because Team USA, we’re back, we’re better than ever! Get prepared, Bosnia, because you’re gonna get it!” ABC7 Los Angeles’s geographically-challenged reporter Abigail Velez.Wild life: “Fear is an important part of life. If you’re ​not afraid and you’re caught off guard, you might see a lion and think it’s a cat.” Carlo Ancelotti – and that was before Norway got their claws in to his Brazilian lads.Men’s health: “The players ​were not sufficiently reassured about ‌being treated by him. We had to find convincing expertise because health comes before everything.” Senegal’s federation president Abdoulaye Fall suggesting that there was an issue with the team doctor – he was, in fact, a gynaecologist.