Relationship counsellors often say couples don’t just marry each other; rather, they marry each other’s families (Photo: iStock)
The disagreement between Ezekiel Ogolla and his wife Wanjiku began after a family gathering, when a conversation with his mother exposed the different values they had each brought into their marriage.
Wanjiku had responded honestly when asked about having children, explaining that they had agreed to wait until they were financially stable. Ezekiel, however, felt she should have handled the conversation more delicately because, in his family, openly contradicting elders is considered disrespectful.
What appeared to be a minor misunderstanding soon revealed a much deeper issue: the couple had been raised with different ideas about respect, family roles and communication.
“This wasn’t really about grandchildren, nor was it about respect either. It was about two people discovering that love had brought together not just two hearts, but two family histories,” explains Polly Menja, a counsellor and relationship expert.
