Three 16 year-old girls with zero previous interest in football are passionately discussing the England v Norway game. Although it’s not the finer points of England’s defence strategy that is occupying their minds, but the finer points of Jude Bellingham. Everything about the 23 year-old Afro-Irish-Jamaican wunderkid is fine, of course – or “mighty fine” in the parlance of teenage girls. As all three of them reliably inform me, Jude is their future boyfriend. Join the queue, ladies: it’s getting longer by the day.
Boy or girl, young or old, gay, straight or anything in between, you’ve likely fallen for Jude Bellingham, the internet’s unfeasibly talented, good-looking, good-humoured, kind-hearted new boyfriend. Maybe it was the goals. Maybe it was the abs. Maybe it was the way he seems in touch with his emotions. Whatever the reason, Bellingham seems to have appeared in people’s lives just when they needed him, a god in godless times. Like all the most memorable players – Pele, Maradona, Messi – Bellingham transcends the game, drawing in those who’ve never followed it as well as captivating those who do.
In these divisive times, he’s one of the few things everyone can agree upon. Jude is good: so good that players and managers are lining up to praise him, including Carlo Ancelotti (who called him “a gift to football”), David Beckham (who’s praised his maturity) and Rio Ferdinand (who’s predicted he could become a Ballon d’Or winner). There’s currently a campaign to rename London’s Jubilee Line the Judeilee Line; even The Beatles are on board, their social media account sharing a photo of him with the word “HEY”, a nod to their iconic song that fans sing in support of him after every match.
