Divorce, once rare and stigmatised, has become mainstream – 42 per cent of marriages now end this way, meaning nearly half of us who get married can expect to experience it in our lifetime. Just as every marriage is different, so is every divorce. In this column, divorcees reflect on their life-changing experience. Helped by the benefit of hindsight, they’ll share advice and reflections.
Eve Stanway, 56, is a psychotherapist and divorce coach. She divorced her husband in 2017, with whom she shares two children, 19 and 24. She lives in Ipswich. Interview by MaryLou Costa.
Divorcing my husband blindsided me. I knew we weren’t happy, but I didn’t think we were actually going to split up. He was the one who asked for a divorce, and it felt like the ultimate rejection of what we had built.
The second big thing hit me like a ton of bricks – the financial reality of the situation.
I was told that going to court with legal representation would end up costing me over £20,000. I was only earning £12,000 at the time, as I had been working part-time on my psychotherapy and coaching business, while being the default parent for our two children, then 15 and 10, in 2017.
