Updated on: June 28, 2026 / 10:12 AM EDT
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At Larry David's Los Angeles office, there are posters, pictures, and the Preamble to the Declaration of Independence – sort of. Among its clauses: "It is illegal to ask to share an umbrella."What's wrong with that? "Because the person who has the umbrella is getting wet, 'cause you're squeezing in," he explained. "Bring your own umbrella!"And what if it's a loved one? "Ehhhh, no."Also missing from the actual Declaration's list of grievances: "It is illegal to stroke one's beard." "I can't stand seeing men doing this," said David. "What if you're Dr. Freud?" I asked. "Hmm, yeah, I don't know," he replied.
Larry David shows Susie Essman a version of the Declaration of Independence with clauses that didn't quite make it, such as, "After January 7th, it is illegal to wish anyone a 'Happy New Year!'"
