There are many reasons why someone might leave a particular faith ― or the concept of organized religion in general. Theological disagreements, life changes, a slow drift away from belief or a single breaking-point moment can all play a role.
If you talk to or follow someone on social media who has left a religious community, you might’ve come across the term “church hurt.” While it’s become a kind of shorthand for a bad experience with a religious community, the reality is deeper than that.
″‘Church hurt’ is harm experienced through or by a religious group,” Tia Levings, an author and former Christian fundamentalist, told HuffPost. “Othering, ostracizing and rejection, judgmental behavior, purity culture and modesty teachings that condition shame, feeling vilified for ordinary development or life attributes ― these are just a few examples.”
It’s a kind of emotional and spiritual pain caused by a particular religious institution, its leadership or its members.
“Church hurt, to me, is about community and expectation,” said Malynda Hale, executive director of the Christian nonprofit The New Evangelicals. “It’s the wound that comes from being let down by the people and the institution you trusted. It’s the gossip, the exclusion, the leadership that protected an abuser instead of a victim, the friendships that disappeared the moment you asked a hard question or left the church.”
