Parenting has never been easy, but in today's world of social media, smartphones and constant digital influence, many mothers and fathers struggle to understand why their children seem more comfortable opening up to friends than family members. Spiritual leader Sadhguru recently shared his thoughts on this changing dynamic, explaining why parents need to rethink their role if they want to remain an important influence in their children's lives.According to Sadhguru, the answer lies in the relationship parents build with their children. Instead of acting like authority figures who constantly direct and control, he believes parents should strive to become trusted friends who offer support, understanding and companionship.Why parenting has changed over the yearsSadhguru pointed out that the role of parents has changed dramatically over the past few decades. Looking at the earlier generations, he said that when he was growing up, parents had the biggest influence on a child's life. Apart from school friends, relatives and a few social interactions, children had limited exposure to the outside world.Today, however, the situation is very different.You Might Also Like:According to Sadhguru, children are influenced by countless sources beyond their homes. From online content and social media personalities to digital communities and entertainment platforms, young people are constantly exposed to ideas and opinions from around the world.Because of this shift, he believes parents no longer have the same level of influence they once enjoyed.Why children turn to friends instead of parentsSadhguru explained that many parents unknowingly create distance between themselves and their children by assuming the role of a "boss."You Might Also Like:He said, "You're not a boss, you don't own them. Your child needs a friend, somebody who reaches out, somebody who plays with them. The whole position of being a parent has significantly changed in the last twenty-five years. Probably when I was growing up, not upon me, but generally as a generation, parents had sixty to seventy per cent influence; school and outside exposure were about thirty per cent. Because you hardly met anybody except your school friends and some family friends, that's about it. That when children want to share something personal, they often choose their friends because they feel understood by them. Parents, on the other hand, can sometimes appear disconnected from their children's experiences and concerns."Your child needs a friend, he doesn't need a boss," Sadhguru said.He emphasised that children are more likely to trust and communicate with parents who engage with them, spend time with them and show genuine interest in their lives.According to him, a parent should be someone who reaches out, plays with their child and approaches life with the same enthusiasm and curiosity that children naturally possess.Don't burden children with your unfulfilled dreamsAnother point Sadhguru strongly stressed was the pressure many parents place on their children. He argued that some mothers and fathers make their children's lives difficult by expecting them to achieve goals that they themselves could not accomplish.Sharing an anecdote from one of his programs in Chennai many years ago, Sadhguru recalled meeting a father who was deeply worried about his daughter's future and academic performance. When he asked the man how old the child was, he was surprised to learn she was only four years old.The spiritual leader said he found it unreasonable that a parent could be anxious about a four-year-old's career prospects, homework and academic success.According to Sadhguru, such expectations often place unnecessary pressure on children and rob them of the joy of growing up.He urged parents not to view their children as extensions of themselves or as opportunities to fulfil personal ambitions.'You are not a boss. You don't own them'One of the strongest messages from Sadhguru's talk was his reminder that parenting is a privilege rather than a position of control.He explained that children come through their parents, but they do not belong to them. Instead of trying to control every aspect of their lives, parents should focus on nurturing and supporting their growth.According to Sadhguru, the responsibility of a parent is to create the right environment for a child to flourish rather than dictate every decision they make.Creating a joyful home environmentSadhguru concluded by saying that one of the greatest gifts parents can offer their children is a peaceful and loving home. He encouraged parents to create an atmosphere where children are not constantly exposed to anger, fear, jealousy, frustration or conflict. Instead, he believes they should grow up surrounded by joy, love and emotional security.According to Sadhguru, children do not need endless lectures or complicated philosophies. If they are raised in a nurturing environment filled with warmth and understanding, they will naturally develop into balanced individuals.For him, good parenting is not about controlling a child's future. It is about creating a space where they feel loved, supported and free to become who they are meant to be.
Sadhguru on why children share their feelings more with friends, not parents: 'Your child does not need a boss'
Sadhguru once suggested that parents should become friends, not bosses, for children. Modern children face many influences beyond family. Parents must offer support and understanding. Avoid burdening children with unfulfilled dreams. Read on to know more about it.
Sadhguru: children confide in friends over parents-as-bosses. Parental influence fell from 60-70% to minimal with digital exposure. Tech leaders note: psychological safety and mentorship outperform command-control. Trusted, autonomous teams drive superior outcomes.










