In the first week of May, Shreya Rajput from Uttar Pradesh’s Deoria dreamt of studying BSc in Criminology. Ankit Singh from Bihar’s Bihta was sure he would clear the competitive medical entrance test in his seventh attempt. Dhruv Tiwari in Delhi’s Preet Vihar was studying every waking minute, hoping to become the first doctor in his family, and Prem Kumar from Jharkhand thought he would be the first in his immediate family to go to college.Within weeks, examination controversies — from concerns over the Central Board of Secondary Education’s (CBSE) new digital evaluation system to cancellation of the National Eligibility-cum-Entrance Test (NEET) and glitches in the Common University Entrance Test (CUET) — left each of these students questioning their futures.Now, as colleges open their admission windows, these students still await their re-evaluated results. As they prepare for retests, some worry that they might not be able to afford the cost of travelling to the examination centre again.Cost of emotional labourAs he stands at a precipice in his academic journey, Dhruv, 17, son of a homemaker and a grocery store owner, says, “I wanted to study at AIIMS, Rishikesh but now I am not thinking about my dream college. College itself feels like a distant dream.” When Dhruv returned after appearing for NEET on May 3, he was confident that his examination had gone well. But a few days later, while scrolling on his mobile phone, he learnt that the examination had been cancelled and he would have to appear again. “I immediately started studying again. It has been a childhood dream of mine to become a doctor and I was very close.” He adds, “Magar ab pata nahi kya hoga (But now I do not know what will happen).”While NEET is the main qualifying examination for medical colleges, CUET has opened doors to Central universities since 2022, even as some rely on the CBSE Class 12 board exam results in cases of tie-breakers. Some private colleges still consider CBSE marks. In certain competitive examinations such as the Joint Entrance Examination (JEE), students require a minimum pass percentage of 75% in the CBSE exam.The controversies unfolded on May 12, with the National Testing Agency (NTA) announcing the cancellation of NEET over allegations of a paper leak after it conducted the examination for 22.05 lakh candidates. The retest is scheduled to take place on June 21.The CBSE results came the next day, which showed that the pass percentage dipped to 85.29% from 88.39% last year. Soon, the board came under fire for discrepancies in evaluation of answer scripts, malfunctioning of the re-evaluation process, and questions over the newly introduced On-Screen Marking (OSM) system. In addition to this, it costs students ₹100 per subject to secure scanned copies, ₹100 for re-totalling, and ₹25 for giving an answer for re-evaluation.While a student, Sarthak Sidhant, 17, began flagging irregularities in the board’s tendering process for the OSM system, yet another examination conducted by the NTA – CUET – faced disruptions and technical glitches. CUET is conducted over a couple of weeks, with some students having to appear for multiple papers.The burden of travelAt 2 a.m. on May 30, Prem, 18, left Hazaribagh in Jharkhand to reach an exam centre in Dhanbad, 200 km away, to appear for his CUET Physics paper. His dream is to be the first in his immediate family to go to college. Originally from Giridih, he moved to Hazaribagh for his schooling.Also Read | Kejriwal urges governments to make bus travel free for students for NEET re-examOn the same day, Akash Kumar, 19, originally from Bishnupura, a village in Bihar, travelled from a relative’s house in Delhi’s Burari to Noida’s Sector 64 for his English and General Aptitude papers, with hopes of leaving his home town and gaining admission in a foreign language course at Jawaharlal Nehru University (JNU) in Delhi.After completing the long journeys, what followed was hours of chaos and uncertainty. At the centres in Dhanbad and Noida, students kept waiting for the exam to start. In Dhanbad, the exam began two hours late. After writing the paper, students were told that their examination was cancelled. In Noida, students say they were told that the examination would not take place after they waited for hours.Prem spent around ₹1,400 that day on food, a train journey, and totos. Akash spent around ₹1,000 on Rapido.“During the two hours that we were waiting at the centre, all I could think of was whether I would be able to appear for a retest if it was cancelled. I have to think of what my family can afford,” Prem says, his voice heavy with exhaustion. He is from a family of farmers and wishes to experiment with AI tools in the future.On the day of the disruptions, the NTA said there had been technical glitches and that its technical service provider had been asked to conduct a root-cause analysis and submit a report. It stated that most students (95%) had completed the examination after the disruptions while 3,765 candidates “chose to leave before the exam could restart”. The NTA has announced that the revised examinations will take place on June 6 and 7 for these candidates.Two days of despairFor Mridul Mayank, 18, from Ludeg, a village in Chhattisgarh, around 400 km from his CUET centre in Raipur, appearing for the examination was fraught with uncertainty from the beginning. Mridul has Type 1 diabetes, for which he follows a strict regimen of insulin injections four times a day. Despite this, he maintained good scores throughout his schooling.With CUET scheduled for May 14, he eventually made it to Raipur on May 13, shelling out ₹10,000 on travel, accommodation, and meals. The same day, his CBSE results were declared. Like thousands of students, he believed he had done well in the examination, but the new OSM system delivered a blow only hours before he was scheduled to appear for CUET.“I was already scared about leaving home for higher studies because of my medical condition. The only thing that kept me motivated was my dedication to studies. But when I saw my board result, I could not believe my eyes. I thought the world around me had stopped,” he says.His family had to convince him to appear for CUET as he had lost motivation. He appeared for the tests on May 14 and 19, only to face technical difficulties at the centre.His mother, Vibha Singh, says, “It was very difficult for him that day. Due to his health, he is already sensitive to stress.”She adds that the timing of the CBSE results on the day before CUET did not help the situation.The board has been posting regular updates and even admitted to “vulnerabilities”. It added that teams have been deployed to strengthen the systems. Amid the row, the Central government replaced the board’s Chairman and Secretary. It also set up a one-member committee to initiate an inquiry into the CBSE’s procurement of services for the OSM system. Meanwhile, students across the country have been protesting against these irregularities.Faulty marking system, glitches in portalShreya, who studied in a CBSE school in U.P.’s Deoria district, says her results gave her a shock. “Almost all my results were bad, but the subject that surprised me the most was Physics, in which I got six out of 70 in the theory component.” In her internal school examinations, her marks were never this low, she says.She hopes to study Criminology and Forensics and does not want to appear for centralised examinations given the “constant paper leaks and cancellations”.Her mother is a homemaker and her father works in a pharmaceutical company. While there are no restrictions in her family on girls’ education, she was set to be the first woman to go to college. But now, she is sending her papers for re-evaluation and is unsure of what will happen. “First, the portal was not opening for two days. Finally, when it opened, I managed to give my Physics paper for re-evaluation. It costs ₹25 per question, so I spent around ₹375 in total.”A teacher who evaluated CBSE papers in Delhi says on condition of anonymity: “There were multiple issues while marking. The papers were not scanned properly and blurry. Marks were getting assigned wrongly and it was difficult to zoom into the questions to read the answers.”She says it was particularly difficult for evaluators with weak eyesight and who are not technology-savvy as they were being asked to check at least 25 answer sheets every day. “The OSM system could have been beneficial for us only if we were given proper training before,” she says.Hopes and expectationsAnkit Singh, 26, says he was full of “josh (energy)” when he first started preparing for NEET in 2018. Now, seven attempts later, he has decided to leave Kota, a coaching hub in Rajasthan, to return to Bihta, a town in Bihar. After the exam was cancelled, he felt it didn’t make sense to keep paying room rent in Kota and investing in coaching classes in the city. Last year, Ankit secured 480 out of 720 when medical colleges in Bihar had a cut-off starting at 510. “This year, I thought it was my turn to make it. I calculated my marks and I was getting around 596, which would have secured me admission in a good medical college. I thought I had cleared it,” he says, only to find out later that the examination had been cancelled and he would have to reappear.The years of preparation came with their share of issues too. Ankit says he did not have the infrastructure in his home town to prepare during the three years affected by the COVID-19 pandemic. He says he has symptoms of anxiety and takes medicines for it.“With NEET comes a respectable job and financial security. I do not want to regret not giving it a real shot.” He still wants to, but says he is tired as paper leaks and cancellations continue to plague the examination.College dreams in limboIn January this year, Sheela (name changed to protect identity), from Bihar, lost her father, who was the only family member who had encouraged her to become a doctor. She had calculated her NEET marks based on the provisional answer key and thought she would score around 620. But then the news of the examination being cancelled came.Now, her brothers are trying to convince her to get married, citing financial constraints and limited pension that is sustaining the household.“The last paper I gave was mentally my last attempt. I do not know where my life will take me by the end of the year. I am unsure if I will reappear for NEET,” she says.Another young woman from Uttar Pradesh, who hoped to do well in the CBSE exam, says she tried to send her papers for re-evaluation, but the portal kept glitching and her requests did not go through. “I do not know what will happen now. My marks are weak, so I will have to stay at home,” she says, with hopes of a college education temporarily dashed.ashna.butani@thehindu.co.inEdited by Sunalini Mathew