The prosecution: Charles

double quotation markWhenever I see Alice’s cloths, I imagine all the bacteria that must be crawling over them

I unceremoniously dumped Alice when she was 23 and I was 26. I’m now 62 and we’ve just got back together.I was a poor judge of character back then. We reconnected last year when Alice sent me some old photos of us on Facebook. I thought: “God, I was such an idiot to dump her.” I’ve since been married three times – my last marriage crumbled during Covid.I was living in Hong Kong and Alice was in Zurich, and despite the six-hour time difference, we chatted for up to eight hours a day until she came to see me in January 2025. When she arrived, my pomeranian ran up the hill to meet her. I just thought: “This is going to be good.”We had a wonderful two weeks, and when she left we both cried. In March this year, I moved to Zurich to be with her. I feel privileged and very happy – but I hate her dishcloths and the way she keeps her sponges.I don’t like dirty things around the sink, but Alice leaves wet sponges in the sink that just sit there for weeks. I think about all the bacteria in them. She doesn’t wash her dishcloths either.In Hong Kong, I had three sets of sponges and dishcloths: a spare set; the ones in use; and the things that are drying after coming out of the laundry. I had a domestic helper who washed and bleached them for me.Whenever I see Alice’s cloths, I imagine bacteria crawling and climbing on them. They’re like petri dishes. I wanted to wash Alice’s cloths when I moved in, but she wouldn’t let me, for some reason.After I’d been here two weeks, Alice bought me a new smiley face sponge with a holder, to make me feel better. I appreciated it. But then one of those blasted dishcloths reappeared. It was foul. I want permission to throw it away.Through karma or fate, we have ended up back together. I have not been in the best mental state, and since we reconnected Alice has supported me through difficult times and I appreciate her. I just want her dirty dishcloths out of the house.The defence: Alice