William Osula is a professional footballer for Newcastle United. He was born in Aarhus and is a Denmark Under-21 international and plays in attack. He has scored seven goals in the Premier League this season and five in his last six matches. Of players who have scored a minimum of five times, his minutes per goal ratio is better than anybody else’s, which means that in this one, small sense, Osula is currently the best in the division.These things are facts – on the record and indisputable – and yet they entirely fail to encapsulate who and what Osula is.So what else, then?Well, in one respect, he is a representation of Newcastle’s season, which has featured a mishmash of strikers gone, going and struggling to fit in, climbing from fourth-choice to first. In another, he highlights just what Eddie Howe can do with a young player given the time and opportunity.Yet this is wholly inadequate, too, because to watch Will Osula play is not about facts or representations or development or any kind of sense that is small. It is watching bafflement in boots. He is a kitten attempting to scrabble its way out of an octopus which, in turn, is seeking to control the body of a man. He is cooked spaghetti in human form. He does things on a pitch which nobody else could do and which nobody else would want to.And while these are not facts, they are true.After Osula celebrated his first goal against West Ham United last weekend with a Michael Jackson tribute act — complete with crotch-grab and glove — Roy Keane was apoplectic. Speaking on Sky Sports, the forever truculent former Manchester United captain called it “crazy, ridiculous, unbelievable — Newcastle have had a poor season.” And then Keane paused and added: “It’s not a bad little move, don’t get me wrong.”(Ian MacNicol/Getty Images)Osula is an alchemist for smiles.But Osula is not content with a single goal celebration. It is not MJ or the highway. His second goal last weekend brought a celebratory mega-mix; a bit of Spiderman, a hint of John Cena and WWE and waving his fingers in front of his face, and perhaps even a sprinkling of animé. And if you do not understand what any of that means, then please do not worry, because neither does he. There are moments when Osula’s head and limbs appear completely disconnected.Keane was right. It has been a jarring old campaign for Newcastle, particularly in the Premier League, but Osula has been a spark and a jolt and an injection of fun. He is also frustrating, but in the way it would be frustrating to witness a crab peeling a banana; there’s no reason for the crab to do it, there’s no way it’s going to work and there’s no earthly reason to watch, except that it’s happening anyway and somehow it’s wonderful. Osula is funstrating.Osula is capable of running the ball into touch, of connecting with thin air in the penalty area, of deceiving six defenders and then scoring a worldie. He can sprint with such velocity that he leaves his brain behind, but he is also eager and willing and hungry. Follow him over the course of 90 minutes and it is eminently possible to think “my god, that lad has really got something,” while also having no clue what that something might be.(Serena Taylor/Newcastle United via Getty Images)Club insiders will tell you that Osula is much the same at Newcastle’s training ground, that he is funny and a bundle of energy, that when he walks into a room, things happen. They will tell you that Howe has been like a father figure, attempting to calm him down and steer him away from immaturity, that Jason Tindall, Howe’s assistant, is always on at him, that Graeme Jones, the first-team coach, has worked assiduously with him in one-on-one sessions.