Here’s a scene that has played out at some point in every primary school class across the world: A child does something obnoxious, dangerous, or just otherwise inexplicably dumb; After removing the coathanger from the power socket or whatever else, the flustered teacher demands to know why on earth the child did this thing; The child points at his neighbor, who is looking studiously out the window, and says, “He told me to”; The teacher sighs and says something like, “If he told you to jump off a cliff, would you do it?” There are children who stare sheepishly at their shoelaces at this point and mumble, “No.” And then there are the ones who grow up to purchase a Tesla Cybertruck. You’d think that we’d be done with “person believes Elon Musk’s claims about the Cybertruck and makes an arse out of themselves trying to verify them” stories, but no, we’re not. Just this weekend, one such rube found himself in jail after deciding to test Elon Musk’s claim that the Cybertruck could be used as a boat: “[The] Cybertruck will be waterproof enough to serve briefly as a boat,” tweeted the world’s foremost brain genius in 2022, “so it can cross rivers, lakes & even seas that aren’t too choppy.” (As an aside: what is Silicon Valley’s objection to the definite article?) So, can the Cybertruck in fact be used as a boat? I mean, come on, look at the thing. Does it look like it floats? Does it have any visible means of propulsion through water? Has anything else that Musk has said about the vehicle been true?