Gird your loins, gentlemen, because the truth is out: women really are measuring you up when it comes to your manhood.

In a study carried out on penis size, along with a man’s height and body shape, the evidence was clear – what women want is a larger lunch box.

Equally, men who looked at a figure with a fulsome phallus found them more intimidating as a sexual rival and fighting opponent.

Shorts

“Men rated rivals with larger penises as more physically threatening and sexually competitive,” said Dr Upama Aich, who led the study at the University of Western Australia.