Working in food service is not for the weak-willed or faint of heart. Many in the industry endure long hours, endless prep and low pay — and a multitude of customers who gleefully add a bit of “hostile” to “hospitality.” Ask anyone who’s ever worked in a restaurant, and you’ll hear stories about customers who made everyone’s lives miserable by sending perfectly good food back to the kitchen.
While chefs and waitstaff acknowledge that mistakes happen, they also know many of the meals sent back are perfectly fine. Customers might be having a bad day, or they’re having a fight with their dining companion. Perhaps they didn’t notice a key ingredient called out in the detailed menu description, and it’s something they hate. Or maybe the power dynamic inherent in the restaurant system — paying someone to serve you — just brings out the beast in already nasty personalities.
“It’s rarely about the food in those moments,” Atlanta-based cocktail curator Keyatta Mincey said. “It’s about control, and that’s when it becomes uncomfortable for everyone involved.”
There are some people you can’t please, and restaurants know it.
New York caterer Chef Rossi, who has shared tales about her mother in two memoirs, said she learned early that some customers see complaining as a golden ticket to better service. “My mother took complaining in restaurants to an art form,” she recalled. “She used to tell me, ‘You may have a wonderful meal, but nobody ever got anything from a compliment. If you could find some little thing to complain about, they might give you a discount or maybe even something for free.’” With this attitude, it’s no wonder that Rossi reported “spending most of my adulthood overtipping waiters just to atone for my mother’s bad karma with the service industry.”
