For many of us, loading the dishwasher isn’t just a household chore, it’s a minefield of opportunities to drive the people we love absolutely bonkers by where we choose to put our dirty bowls, how we insert our spoons, and how much gunk we leave on the lasagna pan.

“It really impacts people’s relationships,” Carolyn Forté, executive director of the Good Housekeeping Institute’s Home Care and Cleaning Lab, recently told us — Raj Punjabi and Noah Michelson, the hosts of HuffPost’s “Am I Doing It Wrong?” podcast — when she dropped by our studio.

“If you’re the type of person that wants to control the dishwasher and how it’s loaded, and your partner isn’t that fastidious, that can be a real bone of contention between couples or partners or whoever — even parents and kids,” she said. “People are very passionate about it.”

That’s why we asked her to share the dishwashing secrets she’s learned during her 40-plus years working in Good Housekeeping’s illustrious test labs — and she did not disappoint.

Click here to listen to the full episode and learn lots of surprising tips and tricks for washing your dishes.