If you've ever read a negotiation book or taken a communication workshop, you've likely heard of "mirroring": subtly copying another person's body language to build rapport.
They lean in, you lean in. They smile, you smile.
The idea is intuitive. We like people who are similar to us, and physical synchrony signals connection and shared understanding. When done well, mirroring can strengthen relationships and increase trust.
I've spent years teaching nonverbal communication at Stanford Graduate School of Business, and the most common mistake I see is mirroring behavior that feels neutral or comfortable to the sender but reads as distant or even hostile to the observer.
Consider crossed arms. For many people, this is simply a resting position. It may signal concentration, reflection, or even that they're cold. So when someone you're speaking with crosses their arms, your instinct may be to mirror them.
